Thursday, June 21, 2012

Just A Little Obnoxious

Dear fellow stubborn and sort of obnoxious independent thinkers,

People have been telling me, "Just you wait until ..." for my whole life.

I've been ignoring them just as long.

I already told you how people predicted stories of doom over my pregnancy (not a single one has come true).

Another pregnant friend, who believes in disciplining children to be pleasant human beings, related to me how people tell her, "Just you wait until you have kids - then you'll see what it's like."

I remember hearing people tell my mom, day in and day out, "Just you wait until they're teenagers!"  Apparently, we were well-behaved in our young years, because the doomsdayer would add, "Then you'll have problems!"

For the record, my mom tells me she loves having teenagers because it's so much easier.  They work on algebra on their own, they make dinner, what's not to love?

People told me that the "honeymoon phase" would fade after six months of marriage.  They extended the deadline to one year when we passed the six-month mark, and then they acknowledged that it could last two years in some cases, and now that we've passed three years of joyful, committed marriage and our love only grows deeper and more exciting every day, they've resigned themselves to saying I just got lucky.

Sometimes it takes a lot of gall to stand up for what you believe in.  Sometimes it takes everything in me to refuse the curses that are verbally offered to me; to not allow them to penetrate and darken my heart.  To not accept the falsehoods and let them become a part of me, part of my expectations, part of my belief system.  "It's terrible to move so often with the Navy."  "Homeschooling is too overwhelming."  "Newborn babies are a nightmare."  "You can't raise kids that behave in public, just you wait and see." 

Surround yourself instead with stories, evidence, and people who support your preferred point of view!  Instead of listening to people speak gloom about raising children, I rely instead on the encouraging examples of my parents, close friends, my own experiences babysitting, and wholly ignore everything the apparently-terrible parents have to say.

Do people ever say, "Just you wait..." to you?  What do they predict for your life?  How do you choose to ignore this (politely, of course!) - what do you do when they are persistent, and when their words start ringing in your ears late at night when you're unsure of yourself?  Do you ever say anything to the gloomers, or do you just smile and nod?

Determined to ignore politely,

Mrs H



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